…. well, at least on some days.

A good friend of mine recently asked me, very politely, to please be kind to Costa Rica and Mexico. This was following my Facebook posting on the problem with litter and trash in both countries. He rightly reminded me that both nations have far more important problems to deal with and don’t have the money needed to address every issue.

I responded that I didn’t think it was only money issue but more of an attitude problem and that such attitudes are formed through education – in the way that we, beginning in the 1960s, were taught not to litter, dump trash or cigarette car ashtrays in parking lots. I still believe this and worry that if people don’t take responsibility for cleaning up after themselves, countries like Mexico and Costa Rica will only get worse in terms of pollution: bad for the citizens’ health and bad for the tourism economy.

A more important point, however, occurred to me: I was being an Ugly Ex-Pat. In the past month, after being robbed three times during the month of August, I got a little pissed off at Costa Rica and let it spread from there. I know that it is a natural reaction but that doesn’t make me feel any better for having done it.

We’ve all heard of the Ugly Tourist (and, no, it isn’t just Americans believe me). But few have heard of the Ugly Ex-Pat unless, of course, they have lived abroad themselves. These creatures are easily spotted by the following characteristics:

- Always hang out with other expats, preferably from their own country
- Will only live where other expats live – often gated communities that cost three or more times the rent or sale price of local homes (and resulting in jacked up prices for the locals)
- Never learn the language of the country they live in and so SPEAK VERY LOUDLY to neighbors, shopkeepers, handymen, etc. figuring that yelling will get their meaning across
- And – the worse sin – comparing everything to how things are done back home and complaining about everything in their chosen country.

At least, I comfort myself, I don’t have these Ugly Ex-pat traits (except the last one on the occasional day).

It is a fine art to balance informing others of the reality of a county – which is what I thought I was doing – and whining about its shortcomings. That is why, when I became an American citizen – with all of the voting and boasting rights – I felt I also had the right to complain about the government wasting billions of dollars in Iraq when people were going hungry in the US and around the world. The difference was that I always couched my criticism by saying that “we… ”.

Just as I said several weeks ago that even experienced travelers can get robbed (even three times in one month!!!), I now acknowledged that even experienced ex-pats can get ugly. Lesson learned.

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